A few days ago, I made the mistake of googling “Katamari earmuffs” to see where they ended up and I was horrified to learn that several people said I look like a man! A man! I wasn’t prepared for that. Fat, frumpy, haggard, retarded, stupid, sure. But mannish? I’m not mannish! Am I? I’m a girl! A girlie girl! Right? Well, apparently not.
Of course, lots and lots of people said nice things, but geez, some of you gaming nerds have a real mean streak. I wish all the nasty people had their pictures posted so I could make fun of them. Crafty nerds are so much more friendly. (I also got “Enya after Prozac on a bad hair day,” which I mostly find troubling because, geeze, I guess I look older than I thought.)
Enough fishing for reassurance that I’m a really a girl.
(Okay, not quite enough. Honestly, I know I shouldn’t dwell on this, but the unexpected insults are so flabbergasting. I had no idea mannish even was a potential insult for me. I’m way more confused than hurt, but still–really? Manly? I’m embarrassed to say fear of looking like a linebacker made me photograph my latest sweater flat and I *hate* flat sweater photos. But I think once I block it and it’s not so hella clingly, I’ll feel less self conscious. But I’ll definitely put on a pushup bra and some lipstick.)
I’m making this for my mom for Christmas. I’m using an almost-black superdark charcoal Berkshire Bulky, I’m only about 4″ in, but I kinda love it already. I think I might make myself one, too. Maybe I’ll get lucky and only use 3 skeins (I have 6 altogether), and then my mom and I can get a creepy mother-daughter portrait. Ooooh, really that sounds fantastic! Maybe all Gorey-style, with creepy dark circles and pasty makeup? Best mother-daughter portrait ever! If only my dad would play along… I can’t see him letting me make him up with goulish makeup… That’s not how he rolls.